opportunity knocks, I answered...

I had the opportunity and good fortune today to attend the round table event hosted jointly by the University of British Columbia and Simon Fraser University, held at the Chan Centre. Conversing about "Balancing Educating the Mind with Educating the Heart", his Holiness the XIV Dalai Lama, Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu, Professor Shirin Ebadi, Dr. Jo-ann Archibald, and Rabbi Schacter-Shalomi gathered in a semi circle on stage to talk about the whole-ness of education and the necessary things to build healthy communities.

I've got a lot to think about. But while I'm processing, here are a couple of my favorite moments of the day.

The first one came when Dr. Archibald led the crowd, including the luminaries, in an exercise designed to touch on the essense of the First Nations Circle. She had us raise our left hand, palm up and extend our right hands palm down, symbolizing the connection with the Spirit and the earth. Then we joined hands and kept them joined for some time. I looked down (I was sitted in the dress circle, above and just to the left of the stage, right in the front) and saw that the Dalai Lama was gently playing with Desmond Tutu's archbishop's right, twisting it slowly around and around. He was doing it carefully and thoughtfully. Archbishop Tutu had the most marvelous smile as he watched and held the Lama's hand.

The second one (ones, plural, actually) was listening to the Dalai Lama and the Archbishop Desmond Tutu laugh together. The Dalai Lama has a deep voice and deep laugh. Desmond Tutu giggles. They got each other going on a number of occasions and it was such a joy to be in their presence. Both men are body laughers, lifting their knees to their chests to properly get into the laugh. Desmond Tutu's laughter sounded like holy laughter. I think that is what it might sound like in heaven. My whole being contracted in joy at the sound.

The third one was at the very end of the dialogue. The Dalai Lama garlanded each of the luminaries with a white shawl (prayer shawl?). As he is quite short, everyone had to lean down for him to put the shawl on. When it was Rabbi Schacter-Shalomi's turn, he leaned down, grabbed the Dalai Lama's head with both of his hands and kissed the Dalai Lama's bald head.

cracks that let the light shine in

This morning, I read Steve's wedding sermon for his friends Nick and Marion. One of the very strange parts of the internet is the voyeuristic sense of being a little too involved in the intimate parts of peoples' lives. On the other hand, I am often given little [sometimes HUGE] glimpses of grace that would otherwise have passed me by.

Reality is what what cracked me open today. Here are a couple of quotes:

"There is a French philosopher with the rather unfortunate name of Nancy. Jean Luc Nancy. Mr Nancy can’t stand false “oneness”. He can’t stand relationships and marriages and communities that just put up a good front.

But Mr Nancy does not give up on marriage. Instead Mr Nancy argues that true relationships, deep oneness, starts with us being real. Starts with each of us acknowledging that there will be disappointment and a bad taste. Because when we are real, when we face our limitations and name our struggles. We are then able to see other reality, to face others limitations and struggles."

and...

"Nick and Marion, you are Christians. You follow a God who accepted you.
Who knew your reality and your limitations. Who loved you as you are.
This is what love is: that God loved us and sent his Son to be the means by which are sins are forgiven. These are the g and j words. God, who loved us in sending us a Son called Jesus.

God.....who did not accept false oneness, who looked past all our “good fronts”

God accepting our reality and our limitations."

"who did not accept false oneness". Why, oh why have I spent so much of my life trying to convince God that I am worthy of his acceptance? Why have I spent over 15 years avoiding Jesus because I can't live up to His ideal and am too proud to want his help? I don't want his help. I want to be accepted and adored for who I actually am; proud, quirky, hurting, succeeding, gifted, broken, whole and fragmented.

It cracked me open this morning to see in black and white the wholeness, the holiness, of being exactly who you are. Limited. Real. And that the brokeness is a much stronger building block than perfection or good intentions could ever be. I felt hope inside. It bubbled. That sense of 'maybe' got in a bit deeper, moving a bit of the performance aside. Maybe Jesus does accept me and won't force his change upon me. Maybe my limitations are the attractive part about me. Maybe, in my limitations and reality, the foundations stones of true building are laid down. In moving away from falsity, embracing my limitations, my disappointments, my reality, space is made for ME. I can move away from pursing false one-ness with Jesus and maybe just be. Be acceptable and accepted.

stories

What are the resurrection stories of our own lives? [note to self to think about] The question comes from Christy's blog.

"the word for world is imagination"*

The above quote caught my attention on my drive home from Whatever tonight. After watching part 1 of Practising the Presence of God by Brian McLaren, we chatted about that illusive connection feeling. I call that feeling joy, imagination, flash, spark, or whatever else catches my fancy at the time it occurs. I remember reading C.S. Lewis' book "Surprised by Joy" a number of years back and being filled with yearning and remembrance at his descriptions of the joy moments.

For me, the moments are as much physical as they are spiritual. My vision gets sharper and brighter. Time seems to slow down. A searing sensation in my brain seems to lock the moments deep inside. My heart slows down and then thumps rapidly. I sigh.

A line of McLaren's caught my imagination tonight. Reading from his upcoming book A Generous Orthodoxy, he stated that no matter how exuberantly he danced or sang to express this connection (my joy), it would be inadequate to express the depths of the experience. I've never been one for heaven talk or Revelations peering, but my joy moments give me a foretaste and certainty of the jewelled reality. I know it with all my being.

World and imagination are both integral parts of the joy moments. The feeling of limitless creativity existing in the richest, deepest, fullest, wholest world. That is my joy.

*A quote from the works of Ursula K. Le Guin, currently playing on cbc Radio One Ideas

If you can't get to Spain....

...and you have an urge to run with animals:

New Zealand's answer to Pamplona: Running with Sheep from the Sydney Morning Herald:

A small New Zealand town reached for some of the glamour and danger of the Spanish bull-run city of
Pamplona yesterday - by running 2,000 woolly sheep through the middle of town.

Having been to both Pamplona and Te Kuiti, this made me laugh!

bye bye

My parents have been in town for the last two months (no, not at my place!). This morning, they left to go back home. I've loved having them here. It has been a great time to get to know one another on a more day to day level, with the option of going back home when the buttons start getting pushed. I wish we lived in the same place, but alas, that's not the case.

wave out the window
heart, hands, eyes, smile show your love;
take highway 1 home