Saturday, January 17, 2004

Into new lands or back to original ones?

I have just started to read Anatomy of the Spirit, the Seven Stages of Power and Healing by Dr. Caroline Myss. All my Christian fundamentalist ideology surges up inside me when I pick a book like this up. "It's new age"; "all lies"; "pray that you would be protected from evil"; "no truth can be found in something so blatantly not Christian"; "It talks about chakras; it must be an unhealthy spiritual influence".

It matters not whether the quotes above are actual quotes or whether they make sense; some of them are and they don't make sense. It's humbling, and a bit scary, to realize that I've been thoroughly indoctrinated, that I would feel a form of fear when I step outside of my ideological enclave. I struggle to know what I believe and hence, have pledged lock, stock and barrel alliegence to the form of Christianity I learned of as a teenager. But I feel locked in as an adult. I can't not have faith (Peter's words describe me: "Where else would we go, Lord? You have the words of life."), but the faith that I have learned no longer fits me. [And yes - I AM making decisions based on what fits me - a decidedly un-Calvanistic way of thinking]. I want to find out the truths, however they are phrased.

This post was prompted by the prayer at the beginning of the book. I reproduce it here in its entirety:

God be in my head and in my understanding
God be in my eyes and in my looking
God be in my mouth and in my speaking
God be in my tongue and in my tasting
God be in my lips and in my greeting

God be in my nose and in my smelling/inhaling
God be in my ears and in my hearing
God be in my neck and in my humbling
God be in my shoulders and in my bearing
God be in my back and in my standing

God be in my arms and in my reaching/receiving
God be in my hands and in my working
God be in my legs and in my walking
God be in my feet and in my grounding
God be in my joints and in my relating

God be in my guts and in my feelings
God be in my bowels and in my forgiving
God be in my loins and in my swiving
God be in my lungs and in my breathing
God be in my heart and in my loving

God be in my skin and in my touching
God be in my flesh and in my paining/pining
God be in my blood and in my living
God be in my bones and in my dying
God be at my end and at my reviving

- Extended from the traditional prayer by Reverend Jim Cotter and printed in his book Prayer at Night, Cairins Publications, Sheffield, England, 1988.